my lover is a very high iq person (140) and he’s so awesome and yea has a lot of knowlegde about a lot of things, but recently i took an iq test and i got 85, it sucks, i told him that i hope that does not affect any aspect of our relationship!! and i’m not going to sugar code it but honestly i think that difference does cause a bit of trouble in our relationship because i am aware that my low iq may cause problems or it could make him feel annoyed/bothered!! what can i do to improve that?? i love him so much and i don’t want him to feel like i don’t understand him, sometiems i don’t a lot but, i always understand the general idea of the stuff he likes and i’m always seeking out more knowledge from him and the wider internet. thank you!!!
edit: i’ve always thought i was 100 or 150+ iq because i am interested in open source software, linux, foss, gnu, the fediverse, and reading, etc!! programming too
There is nothing wrong about an IQ difference.
Where there are problems is when the higher is annoyed by the other needing explanation or the lower having a complex about needing the explanation.
If you love it when you don’t get it and they can explain it in terms you understand and they love it when they can fulfill your curiosity, perfect.
If you hate how they make you feel stupid or they are annoyed that you just don’t get it no matter how they try to explain it, that is a problem and either party can be at fault in both cases. There is the old saying that if you can’t explain it properly, you don’t understand it fully, I feel that applies.
Talk with them, be honest and raw in your thoughts. Express your concerns about how you, as you are, may be less than they deserve. If they love you, they will try so damn hard to express themself so that you understand.
You shouldn’t be asking the internet, ask them. Your insecurity or anxiety is not for us to cure, your partner is the only one that can beat that into your thick little skull. I joke, but really, there is no comfort or validation strangers on the internet can provide that beats your partner saying how much they love and appreciate you for you regardless of your flaws or shortcomings.