Please don’t ask why I need this.
It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.
It has to be something I can easily find.
EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:
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I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.
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I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.
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I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.
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I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).
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Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.
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If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.
Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.
1 word: pancakes. Nature’s cork.
Nobody’s ever said that before.