Hey Folks!

I’ve been living abroad for over half my life in a country where tipping is not the norm. At most you would round up. 19€ bill? Here’s a 20, keep this change.

Going to the US soon to visit family and the whole idea of tipping makes me nervous. It seems there’s a lot of discussion about getting rid of tipping, but I don’t know how much has changed in this regard.

The system seems ridiculously unfair, and that extra expense in a country where everything is already so expensive really makes a difference.

So will AITA if I don’t tip? Is it really my personal responsibility to make sure my server is paid enough?

  • BrainisfineIthink@lemmy.one
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    17
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    1 year ago

    it’s not really an option to simply not tip without being the bad guy

    My man you have got to shake this from your psyche, that’s exactly how the employers that aren’t paying their employees want you to feel. You’re offloading their greed and systematic exploitation of working class people onto yourself under the misplaced guise of personal guilt. There may not a way to immediately fix the problem, but I can guarantee it will never get fixed if we dont change anything.

      • Arcaneslime@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        1 year ago

        He’s suggesting “fuck the worker, it isn’t my problem if they can’t pay rent, they should learn to code.” And somehow that will make the business owner pay them a fair wage and not replace them with a machine or a 16yo kid.

    • MedicareForSome@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      1 year ago

      In some cases we’re talking about people making $2.13 an hour in a country where you’re easily paying $1,000 a month or even more for a studio apartment. I’d say if you don’t tip you’re the bad guy.

      This type of change isn’t going to come from people just deciding that waitstaff should starve and refusing to tip. If anything it will come from unionization of waitstaff or from legislation.

      • TWeaK@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        No, the bad guy is still the employer, and the culture that exploits both employees and customers and pits them against one another.

        Meals in the US are not cheaper than meals in other countries. The menu price is roughly the same. Meals plus tips in the US cost significantly more than meals in other countries.

        However staff generally benefit from this arrangement. Places that have trialed better wages and no tips have found that staff make less than what they did if they got tips. So only the customer actually wants a fair deal out of it, and everyone else isn’t willing to change.

      • BrainisfineIthink@lemmy.one
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        I mean, in a lot of ways it already is. More and more people aren’t taking theses jobs that pay shit, and yours constantly seeing places fold or be understaffed. It’s also a little disingenuous to use the extreme as an example. The vast majority of tourist destinations (relevant because OP) are not paying below minimum+ tips. It would be helpful if OP Said where they were going but assuming it’s a popular destination, they don’t need to be heavy handed. It’s also misleading to paint it as black and white “assume tipping 20%” everywhere is bad advice. There is no expectation to tip for over the counter service, take out, etc. That is a fairly recent evolution and one that is already backfiring. If OP isn’t sitting down in a restaurant where they have a server waiting on them for 30-60 minutes, they are probably absolutely fine not tipping. 15% is also still acceptable, 20% is excessive unless the service was absolutely excellent.