Why are you getting down voted so much? Isn’t this just a post of you figuring out and explainig that dnd 5e isn’t the best fit for you (in a comedic way)? Did I misread the entire post?

What’s the system you wanted to try?

If there is a local game store in a city nearby, you’ll likely find people, who are looking to play.

I disagree with your disagreement. Sure, if you already know your party and everyone is experienced, you can skip it, but if you start as a new player group, it is well invested time, that should be used to get to know each other and lineup expectatios.

I like KDE Connect quite a bit. Its a great tool to show of in front of my Windows friends and super usefull for media control.