When I lie, it’s most often a lie of omission. Are you more of a falsehood teller? Or do you lie out of ignorance? Or is there a particular subject you’re likely to lie about? Or a person who you tell most of your lies to?
Do you always tell the truth? If yes what type of lie was that?
“I’m fine.”
Ouch
“Yeah, I’m fine”
“Did you find everything okay?”
Dude, you’re a grocery cashier. I know full well that if I unload my whole fucking arrogant engineer-ass evaluation of your whole store’s problems at your face, it will do absolutely nothing but make us both unhappy. So I don’t.
Everything is great.
Y’all are out of the good eggs and I had to settle for the okay eggs.
I understand why maple syrup is next to Bisquick instead of next to sugar and molasses and corn syrup, but I still disapprove. Sweeteners are sweeteners, not baking ingredients.
But you really don’t care. You have zero input into your store’s purchasing decisions. You want to ring me up and get through your day and go home to your hot boyfriend.
So yeah, I found everything okay.
I’ll do it tomorrow.
I wish this comment wasn’t so relatable.
Most common lies I tell are usually just to stop people focussing on a certain part of a story or anecdote. They’re technically lies but aren’t relevant.
Lets say i’m talking about my weekend to a friend or colleauge. I mention that on friday night in a certain bar or location something happened. Well if I know that person is going to pick up on the location eg: “Why were you there”.
I don’t really care they know I just cba with my story being picked apart for something that’s not really that relevant, I was just setting the scene.
Not always a lie (though when it is truth it’s mostly in a technically-the-truth way), but I like to fuck with my friends by sharing media and misleading them into thinking things will happen a certain way so they don’t see the plot twists coming. Kind of like reverse-spoiling them.
And if you’re thinking “there’s no way they’d believe you after the first couple of times” - it’s when they stop believing me that the fun starts.
Throwing in pieces of truth, reverse psychology, lies by omission, alluding to something that A. doesn’t happen but B. is so out there that they start wondering “but maybe…”. I also have honed my control over my facial expressions from my years on customer service so that I can feign confusion or incredulity perfectly on the occasion that they make a correct prediction.
The friend I primarily do this with is pretty gullible and gets very emotionally invested in stories (that’s how I ended up starting with this), but I’ve been working my way up with less gullible friends to hone my bullshittery to greater heights, and the results have been greatly satisfying.
Great fun, 10/10, highly recommend if you and your friends like plot-twisty media.
I hope this email finds you well.
Oh, man. Email is a real bitch. The context for me when I say this is the shipping industry and/or the software developers for shipping software.
If you ask more than one question, take your pick, just one will be answered. “Please see below?” You’re going to get asked a question that could’ve been answered by “please see below.” These dumbfucks will go out of their way to make anything as grating as possible. Send an attachment? “Oh my ancient-ass Outlook Express is too fucked up to show me that.” S/MIME? “Can’t read your email!” JSON? “What’s that, we run a cobbled SOAP someone wrote back in 1999.”
People can’t figure out threading if it were to save their life. Add in a bunch of douchebag hotshots between separate threads, discuss four different accounts between three threads, why not? Apparently email is a complicated brand new technology that office workers have yet to master but sure let’s conduct all of our business on it forsomefucking reason.
Fuck
It’ll be okay.
I don’t lie to anyone except my employer. They are not owed any explanation or insight into my personal life, and personally I feel that that is the only acceptable instance for me to lie at this point in my life.
Circumstances change, but I generally try and lie as little as possible.
I’m good, how are you?
Lie I tell most often: “I’m fine.”
It is easier to do, and easier on the conscience to lie by omission, so that’s the kind of lie I do most often, which is mostly to smooth things over in social situations.
Rather than telling the truth, which would require me to talk about my mental health and current state, and face possible stigma, I’d rather just lie about being fine.
"I am a happy and engaged employee "
“you’re ugly and your mother dresses you funny”
My kids dress themselves.
“I will do it tomorrow”, I say that to myself and to many people. Not proud of this.
I lie on the internet fairly regularly as weird precaution to make myself less identifiable. I don’t want any of my accounts to link to eachother, let alone back to me
Approved. Just make it a good and enticing story. I don’t care so much if it’s true 😉
That’s my sentiment as well. I take everything I read with a grain of salt, so should everyone else. I come to comment sections for entertainment, not facts.
